Skip to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.
Security Installer Community

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.

The Asda Greeter

sparky999
in Just Joking

Featured Replies

The ASDA Greeter (priceless)

A very loud, greasy, unattractive, tattooed, welfare dependent, chav,

minger, woman wearing a Celtic top walked into ASDA in Castlemilk (a

sprawling council estate on Glasgow's south side) with her two kids,

yelling obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.

The ASDA greeter said pleasantly, 'Good morning madam, and welcome to

ASDA.

Nice children you have there. Are they twins by any chance?'

The ugly woman stopped yelling long enough to say, 'F*ck naw, they're

nae twins.

The oldest one's 9, and the other one's 7.

Why the f*ck would you think they're twins? Are you blind, thick or just

stupid?'

'I'm neither blind nor stupid, Madam,'replied the greeter.

'I just couldn't believe you've been shagged twice.

Have a good day, and thank you for shopping at ASDA.'

Peter Robinson

Freelance

M:07889038650

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

Go to topic listing

Recently Browsing 0

  • No registered users viewing this page.

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.

I accept

Account

Navigation

Search

Search

Configure browser push notifications
Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.