OriginalBoffy

"People say I'm a lazy writer; especially my children, Qwerty and F12." https://t.co/tpzlN30gRq

"I've tried it out several times now, in my imagination, and it works EVERY TIME." https://t.co/Q9XVEjWGV7

RT @willbrooks1989: One last one, with some tweaks to Peri's 'out there' costume, too... https://t.co/CVuaAoPNcc

RT @Gingerhazing: i've had an article open on my computer for 2 days called "how to beat procrastination" and I still haven't gotten around…

"It's horribly, unrelentingly hot. I should go and stand by a fire before eating hot food out in the sun."

It's far too hot and far to cold.

RT @MooseAllain: Farage stepping down to spend more time with his family, who are gutted to hear the news.

"I certainly was getting the willies, and once you get 'em, they grow." - John Wyndham, The Day of the Triffids

https://t.co/9wiC8uzwZl

"The limits of folly itself, particularly of folly with fear on its heels, are not easy to define." - John Wyndham, The Day of the Triffids

RT @changeist: Well, the BBC planned ahead for today's lineup. https://t.co/mTLkShiQFU

@LucozadeEnergy I've seen your recent tweets trying to explain how 0 = 3.8, but that's just not how zero works. https://t.co/nXr2N4glms

I am a coward through and through. If you cut me, I bleed yellow, then run away and hide.

I want to be buried with a flint axe through my head, with a note in my hand saying "The world must know Tony Robinson's terrible secret..."

RT @dril: 1989: the fall of the berlin wall is celebrated, historically revered 2016: i tear down the sneeze guard at old country buffet an…

RT @SusanCalman: Thorgi. Have a super day. https://t.co/FjUdx47o8Z

The guitarist thought they should re-record all the drums for the album, but the drummer was concerned about the repercussions. #pun

GOOD IDEA: Use hand sanitiser to avoid spreading your cold. BAD IDEA: Eat something afterwards and then lick your fingers.

Adorable little kid on the tram is pointing to our Mr. Men holdall and telling her mum who they all are.

When it comes time to flee the giant star goat, Steve Wright can go on the B Ark.

Finally found a fairtrade instant coffee which doesn't taste like ****

"Phil? His first name is 'Agent'."

I think I just figured out sudoku.

The cheeky squirrel in our garden is climbing along a branch, shaking the squirrel-proof bird feeder, then eating the seeds which fall down!