OriginalBoffy

"Go to the appendices of LotR […] read the list of all the kings of Rohan, their names are all just words for ‘king’." - @MikeDrout

"I can't remember ****, I'm like basically a ******* walking Etch-a-Sketch" - @MargaretCho

"I certainly was getting the willies, and once you get 'em, they grow." - John Wyndham, The Day of the Triffids

"I told Suzy I must be a writer, because I had writer's blank." https://t.co/7jhDQgl4gL

"I've tried it out several times now, in my imagination, and it works EVERY TIME." https://t.co/Q9XVEjWGV7

"It's horribly, unrelentingly hot. I should go and stand by a fire before eating hot food out in the sun."

"People say I'm a lazy writer; especially my children, Qwerty and F12." https://t.co/tpzlN30gRq

"Phil? His first name is 'Agent'."

"So I told her my side of the story, and I just stuck to the facts that I'd made up." - Sarah Kendall https://t.co/sOOEtC3psk

"The Daleks are coming to save us! Three cheers for the Daleks!" - Doctor Who: Blood of the Daleks by Steve Lyons https://t.co/FydAktNON9

"The following arguments are available, but not all are useful, functional or sufficiently documented" - Software author after my own heart

"The limits of folly itself, particularly of folly with fear on its heels, are not easy to define." - John Wyndham, The Day of the Triffids

"The reclamation by UKIP of tweed is very unfortunate for the lesbian community" @SusanCalman News Quiz Extra S19E08 https://t.co/7TW4HUsCJZ

"We are currently experiencing high call volumes. Please try to speak more softly."

"You got stewed pea and rice, and sweet potato pudding, jerk pork, curried goat, curried chicken, fried plantains,… https://t.co/fM2q4loAwX

"You know how much we Indians love our gold. Almost as much as the British love the Indians' gold." - @awryaditi https://t.co/OqCfJb5NDB

"You spend all your time womanising!", I said, congratulating the dedicated gender reassignment surgeon.

“Any year now, I might have to say something. Actually, no; easier just to move house.” https://t.co/YUFnpepdsG

@Gingerhazing I just finished Nimona. So wonderful, beautiful & sweet, thank you. Also my wife happens to have Nimona's chapter 10 haircut!

@LucozadeEnergy I've seen your recent tweets trying to explain how 0 = 3.8, but that's just not how zero works. https://t.co/nXr2N4glms

@MCRMetrolink When a tram terminates mid-journey "due to a service time issue", what does that mean?

@northernassist @OfficialTfGM Thanks ☺

Adorable little kid on the tram is pointing to our Mr. Men holdall and telling her mum who they all are.

All my stuff's covered in jam. Curiously, this feels like a stroke of BAD luck.