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I Burnt Me Spuds And Me Sausage


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I moved a pestle and mortar an touched enough dried chili

seeds to make 2 Bangalore curries,and i forgot to wash my hands, :fear:


i was walking to the bog an i scratched me nuts

i wasn't in there long before i ran too the sink

an franticly splashed cold water on me

pork an potatoes :o  :cry: jeeezus



Edited by EggyBum69
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Many footballers like to smother themselves in white horse liniment - making it a bad mistake about not washing hands to copy if they then make a 'comfort visit' just before the match ;).

My older brother had a chance casual relationship, a short while after decided he had risked catching an SMD, to shy to seek proper advice, he performed some self medication,

pouring neat Detol over his cannon and balls!

so if you think you know pain, he was off work for over a week in hospital with shock!


sympathy only please, no sniggering at the back ;)

If you think education is difficult, try being stupid!!!!

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My brother is 6 years older, in our respective teens safe sex was having a padded head board - no bed, just the headboard!

If you caught something back then it was curable at least, if embarrassing. You were more scarred of your Dad catching you smoking - his fags!

Having a severe OCD about hygiene, If my brothers casual wild oats were being sewn now, he'd likely wear a condom for a hand job :).

Just thinking, i wonder in the bottle if Detol if it had a health warning on it 'might contain nuts'?

If that was all it contained back then lol!

If you think education is difficult, try being stupid!!!!

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  • 7 months later...
  • 2 weeks later...

Well Eggybum, at first i thought you were exaggerating, so i did what a good installer should always do, i recreated the situation and tested. I concur, it is not a wise thing to forget.


So to conclude, do not wash your hands in chilli, then rub your hands on the old saggy cannon.


Official Report = Not wise, though repeating of this procedure can become pleasurable over time.


There for ya dude......

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  • 1 month later...

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